Sunday, June 11, 2006

Putting on the Primer

While my daughter was out of town I decided to tackle a home improvement project. Painting my kitchen.

Before I could begin painting I had to prep the walls and this meant one thing. Removing the wallpaper. It started easy enough, one pull on the border put up in 1985 caused it come off in one roll. This was going to be easy.

Borders removed, I tugged on a corner of the wallpaper and the whole section came off in a huge sheet. Underneath it revealed a pattern original from 1975 when the home was built. I was surprised, it was a quaint yellow floral pattern with a zippy stripe. I tugged at its corner it wouldn't come off.

Oh my goodness, what have I gotten myself into? Two alternating layers on the wall - I had to move forward and finish the job.

I removed as much of the second wallpaper layer that I could and realized that I was going to need professional help. The first layer was never going to come off. Three walls were cleared and I took down the out of date lace curtains and threw the sheets of wallpaper and unwanted curtains in the trash. For some reason, it felt good to know I was never going to see those curtains again that had blocked the sunshine from coming into my windows.

After interrogating my sister and friends who have found themselves at the successful end of similar projects. I sought out their advice. Great recommendations abounded so I used the best of the best and was on my way.

A trip to Home Depot ensued and I wandered back to Floors and Walls and found some heavy duty spray solution to saturate the stubborn layer of wallpaper.

One thing my sister told me that would make the project go faster ... put on some good music. I started out with Billy Joel "Songs in the Attic". I realized listening to the music that it was probably written before all the wallpaper in this room was applied. When I finally psyched myself up to try the spray, I read the instructions, sprayed the solution and waited for 15 minutes and went at it again. Most of it came off in sheets but some unyielding remnants remained.

I was standing in a chair working on the area above the closet that houses my washer and dryer when I realized how winning the struggle over the resistant wallpaper and peeling off the final shreds felt reminscint of my inner conflict over my marriage that had ended and how I felt like somehow I had lost part of my soul.

But I realized as my head was close to my ceiling and reaching for the final pieces of tattered wallpaper that the first layer of paper that was hanging firm on the wall was my authentic self. The second layer I was struggling to peel off the walls was akin to my married persona I had taken on and even the sad surrender I had given in to during those years. Some of it I had to spray a second time and come back later and examine if it's ready to give yet and break free from the wall- that piece wasn't ready to give yet - much like my psyche not yet ready to relinquish that part of my fractured soul.

I listened to the Billy Joel CD so many times my portable CD player had gotten hot, so I switched to my stereo and put in a cassette tape of Kool & The Gang's "Emergency". Wow, memory lane of my girlhood self ... songs like Fresh, Mislead, Celebration, Emergency, andSurrender were playing. As I was jamming and peeling wallpaper my dog was looking at me as if I lost my mind. I think I was scaring her gyrating so close to the ceiling while standing in a chair and picking wallpaper strips off with my fingernails.

And while I have been blabbing that I miss the old me so much and what I wouldn't give to reclaim that girl I used to be, I realized that like the cheery, quaint yellow zippy striped wallpaper that I had a fondness for - I wasn't going to let it stay up on the walls. It was time for a new coat of paint, one that matches the swatch I taped to the wall that proclaims this is the new color for my kitchen, this is the new color for me.

It is time for my home (i.e. self)-improvement project undertaking to capture what I like about both the original wallpaper and remove the parts of the second layer that I didn't like. I might have to get my hands and fingernails sticky along the way to remove those layers, but that's okay - the end result is going to be worth it. Not an extreme home makeover, but a fresh new (out)look.

After the wallpaper is removed, I'm washing down the walls and getting out my primer.

2 comments:

Bird On A Line said...

Good for you, on two levels. One for doing some home repiar, the other for realizing that you can heal from this and embrace the new you. I happen to like this you anyway! ;)

TD#3 said...

I wrote this when I was in the wallpaper stage. After finishing the paint coat - I've realized this morning from transformation comes pain - I can hardly move today and Oh My God - My kitchen is gold (more like a mustard yellow) Yikes!